PARTY at the plot

Prosecco vs. Ground Bees

You are at the allotment, you’ve been working hard, you’ve caught up with all the gossip from the other gardeners. Then someone offers you a glass of wine. Wow, this is excellent. We chat more. Should that new allotment-holder have rotovated the ground with all this bind-weed? No, we all agree. Another glass? OK.

After this spontaneous affair you really must decide to go home now. Because if you decide to carry on gardening you may regret it. You feel the urge to go thin the carrots. You approach the bed, bend down and get your earring caught in the nets. You catch your breath, stumble and end up rolling around and crushing your precious carrots. You are stuck in the nets like an endangered species. But you are not worthy of a Green Peace rescue.

You can’t get up, everyone has gone home and there’s no service on your mobile. Then it dawns on you that you could be trapped here all night. You fear hyperthermia and you also realize that those cute ground bees you had recently marveled at were twelve inches from your nose.  You had only just harped on about how blessed you were that the bees had set up home in your raised bed. After the first glass you made it sound like you were the chosen one.

This is all very foolish, on refection. Anaphylactic shock might be the correct punishment. The discovery of your rigid body covered in snail trails and bloated bee-stung face would frighten the toughest of crime-scene investigators. You notice red kites too, circling above eyeing you up for carrion. Are your eyes their first course?

You are fool to stumble about the allotments without due care and attention. Allotments can be dangerous places. So keep the wine or pimms or whatever for the safety of your lovely garden at home, where there’s a phone and other people. End of lesson.

five legged cat
How many glasses of pimms? How many legs on that cat?

This was a Health and Safety Announcement.

A Wall of stunning herbiness

Herb rack all fluffed up in june webLOVE YOUR HERBS
My unique herb rack keeps my herbs organized and is ideal near the kitchen. I designed this for my tiny garden as it requires no floor space. It has proved so popular that the herb rack has been featured in Garden News and friends have asked me to make them one.

Herb rack first planted in March
Herb rack first planted in March

Its made from wood cut to my specifications then off it goes to be tanalised. This is where is placed into a vacuum chamber where moisture is sucked out of it and preservative impregnated. It sounds quite drastic to go to all this trouble but I reckoned that there would be a lot of water about whilst obviously watering the herbs. So this baby will never rot. Then I used marine standard screws with raised heads for a modern look whilst being rust proof too.

You don't have to stick to herbs either. I've added chillies, tomatoes and black Ophiopogon grass.
You don’t have to stick to herbs either. I’ve added chillies, tomatoes and black Ophiopogon grass.
Purple heather look so funky on the wall rack.
Purple heather look so funky on the wall rack.

POTTY ABOUT HERBS
The containers are plastic as I thought galvanized steel ones would literally bake the herbs, and not in a good way. The containers are dishwasher proof and frost proof (I know this as I kept one in the freezer as an experiment). They come from a large home-ware store so are reliable in terms of availability and quality. Colours are white, orange, red, bright green and black.
Now back to the rack. I’ve painted it in two shades of especially mixed (by me) Culprinol wood paint. I chose a neutral grey that looks good against brick and shows the herbs off too.

Pots clip firmly onto light grey slat. Choose plants to compliment pot colours.
Planters clip firmly onto light grey slat. I chose plants to compliment the brightly coloured pots .
Pretty purple pansies greet you at the front door
A six herb rack installed in the porch. Pretty purple pansies greet you at the front door.
The green wall planting. Winter plants on their summer holidays.
Other ways of using the racks – this my  green wall planting. Heathers were fabulous in the winter but at the moment the plants on their summer holidays and are happy just being green.
Herbs are thriving in the sun
Herbs are thriving in the sun

My next project is to make a strawberry rack. How cool would that be? Watch this space. I’m always on the look out for different style containers so drop me a line is you see any…

A blog about my gardening exploits to inspire, even if its looking like its all about go wrong. (Which it does, alot)